The end, at least for now. Whether it remains that way is still unknown, so various questions are still unanswered, but hopefully in a way that nobody will want to punch me for :)
To
ascoolsuchasi for the final time, because your response to part three made me cry uncontrollably with tears of joy. True story.
Part one,
Part two, and
Part three.
(
In which there is an awkward morning-after conversation and things end more or less happily ever after )